A Testimony of Experience From

Joyce Rigsby

Note:  Joyce is a writer and has written articles on deafness for various magazines, as well as a book on the experience of losing her husband (a doctor) prematurely.  Joyce has been losing her hearing for many years, finally joining the world of deafness.  Then, she had the controversial operation for a cochlear implant.  Now she is more or less 'hearing' when it's working, and deaf when it is not.  If we can set aside the emotional aspects of this controversy, and hear her spiritual applications, we will all be blessed!  Joyce is retired and lives in Loma Linda, CA.  She has also been a guiding light in getting a small school for deaf children started in Ethiopia, North Africa.

                        "Oh, that my people would listen to me. . ."           
                            Ps. 81:13

"I'm Listening for Your Voice . . ."                            
     To understand others it is said that you need to walk a mile in their moccasins.   I've walked many miles with ears that heard smatterings, or nothing, and as a result I  understand the deaf and hard of hearing better than most hearing people.   Though I have a cochlear implant now, all I need to do is unhook my speech processor and I'm deaf again.   If a battery dies or a wire breaks I'm back in the deaf world. 

      I know what it's like to strain every fiber in me and still not hear enough to understand. . . . . But I've also learned more about God's voice and His longing that we, His children, hear and understand Him.  I would like to share some parallels.

External Conditions that improve reception
     As my hearing deteriorated I found myself angling to get as close as possible to the speaker.  To hear God best, we need to draw close to Him.  Closeness to Him isn't physical but rather a felt presence as in an old hymn,  "I can feel His presence near me and His arms around me thrown."  Many poets have responded to this idea in hymns: Nearer My God to Thee, I would draw nearer to Jesus, Near to the Heart of God, Nearer still Nearer, Jesus keep me near the cross. . .  and more.  Desire is the necessary ingredient to drawing closer - ask anyone who has been in love. 

    Eliminating background noise is another essential for the hard of hearing - too often we miss God's voice because we are distracted.   C.S. Lewis states that for a Christian the "first job of the day is to shove back the wishes and hopes for the day that rush at you like wild animals.  Listen for that other voice. . ."    Henri Noewen writes "Through spiritual discipline we prevent the world from filling our lives to such an extent that there is no place left to listen. . .  We do not take the spiritual life seriously if we do not set aside some time to be with God and listen to him". (1)

    While becoming deaf I soon realized that the better I knew someone the more likely I was to understand them.   One day I was encouraging a daughter to learn sign language and she said, "But Mama, you've  read my lips all my life."   I had watched those baby lips for her first words and understood her long after I couldn't understand many others.  Abraham must have known God very well to be able to recognize His voice when told to kill Isaac. 

     Darkness cuts off nearly all communication for a deaf person who relies almost totally on visual input.   Before my husband Bob died I was wearing two hearing aids and I remember how I missed the "pillow talk" when at night I took the aids out and the light was turned off.   We did not know sign language so signing into each others hands as the deaf do was not an option, yet I knew Bob loved me.   Similarly God wants me to trust him even when it grows dark and  I can't see or understand what's happening.  

 
Internal Conditions that Improve Reception
       For those who take hearing for granted, passive listening is often the norm.  When I was a teenager my parents sometimes checked me out to see if I had been listening during family worship.  Usually I'd be able to repeat the last few words to satisfy them but I was a passive listener who often didn't listen actively.    Once my hearing started to decline I had to be an active listener or I didn't get anything.    And finally, listening took so much energy that it could be termed "aggressive listening".   The aggressive listener comes diligently seeking to hear what God has to say.  There is a fervent focus I did not posses as a teenager.   

      A passionate desire to know what the speaker is saying will make you "hang in" until you do understand.   It's a bit harder to persevere if you feel unworthy of the person's time as I often did when I needed many repetitions of the same piece of information.   Some people are not willing to take the time a hard of hearing person needs to communicate.    God is always willing to wait  patiently for me to hear His voice.   In How to Listen to God , Charles Stanley states:
    nothing is more urgent
        nothing is more necessary,
            nothing more rewarding than hearing what God has to say. (2)

Ways God Speaks - "For God does speak - now one way, now another . . . " 

                                Job. 33:14

       We must accept any way God chooses to communicate with us be it through success or failure, pleasure or pain.   One simple way is to make us restless with an uneasiness in our hearts -  while the primary way will be through the Scriptures.   Not the "here a little, there a little" study for the purpose of proving a point (or writing a sermon or article!).  As repeated workouts bring about the physical changes we want, it is daily meditation over an extended period of time that gives spiritual health.   Quick fixes don't exist in either realm.   C. S. Lewis suggests that we "steep ourselves in a Personality" versus learning a subject.   John Wesley believes that people sometimes want direct revelation on issues that could be resolved by honest Bible study.

     Experience can also be the voice of God if knowledge of the Bible is used as a filter.   C.S. Lewis believes, "God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our conscience, but shouts in our pains: it is His megaphone to rouse a deaf world."(3) But it is possible to hear his voice and not recognize it even if God uses supernatural means.   After Christ's baptism God spoke (John 12:27-33) and yet, even though the voice was audible and distinct, all some heard was thunder.   

      Nature is another way. Theoretically it should be easier for the deaf to interpret God's messages from nature for they are accustomed to incorporating every visual clue into messages they receive.  A raised eyebrow or an expanded sign add to any message but how much more a beautiful rainbow, sunset or star studded sky speak in God's sign language if we have eyes to see and hearts to understand.  

     God also uses dreams and visions to speak to us.   Acts 2:17,18 tells of the New Testament fulfillment of Joel's prophecy, "I will pour out my Spirit upon all flesh: your sons and your daughters shall prophesy and your young men shall see visions, and your old men shall dream dreams . . ."   This promise was not only for Bible times.

People Who Hear God's Voice 
      I must be available to answer the phone if I want to hear the voice on the other end.   Similarly I must be available all the time in order to hear God's voice as He may not be calling during the specific hour I've dedicated to meditation.   He may want to speak to me at inconvenient times.  Do your close friends call only at designated times?  Being available to best friends is a privilege and can be regarded as a joy rather than an interruption of plans.

     God speaks to those who are willing to obey His voice.   Acts 8 tells of Philip's going to Samaria where he preached Christ to the people and many were baptized.   This revival was important enough that Peter and John joined him from Jerusalem.  "And the angel of the Lord spake unto Philip saying, "Arise and go . . . unto Gaza which is in the desert."  Humanly speaking it made no sense to leave a revival he'd started!   He didn't recognize the command as a providential opening that would spread the gospel - the command actually didn't make sense until after he'd obeyed. 

   The humble will hear Him as did Moses who was the most humble man on the face of the earth.  Those who truly love God, and take the time, will hear Him best.   But if there are things I really don't want to hear, my inner desire can keep me from hearing God.    

How to Identify God's Voice
     There are many voices speaking to us besides God's : emotions, pressure we feel from others and the voice of evil to mention a few.  All these can masquerade as God's voice.    Recognizing His voice takes practice and more practice.

      Speech sounded like Donald Duck fast forward when I first started hearing after surgery for a cochlear implant.  It's taken time and effort besides desire to be able to understand speech.  At first I couldn't understand tapes unless I was listening aggressively and doing nothing else at the same time.   But practicing has even made it possible for me to recognize the accent of a seat mate on the plane.   Much practice will make it possible to recognize God's voice even if you can't now. 

    A few pointers : His voice will always be consistent with Scriptures but may conflict with human wisdom for His ways are not our ways.   He won't tell you to do something that will set you back spiritually, nor will His voice advise you to do things to gratify the flesh but rather to seek benefit of others as well as self.   His voice is never harsh or his speech crude and He will not contradict himself. 
        .   .   .   .   .   .   .   .   .
     I put this aside to finish.  One evening a couple days later a friend shared her reason for changing to a church other than the one she'd grown up in.   She was obviously closer to God than ever before but I was concerned about explaining her absence when I attended her "old" church.   I watered my agapanthus and went to bed with a prayer in my heart.  

     During sleep my friend's story and my potted plants must have woven themselves into a pattern because when I awakened the word "transplanted" stayed with me.  It dawned on me that not all plants keep blooming where they're planted, and that some benefit from being transplanted.  I believe God sent me the reassurance I needed to face questions about what some might term 'backsliding'.   I believe the word "transplanted" was directly from Him and rejoiced that I had heard and understood. 

                              
  Bibliography 

(1). Devotional Classics edited by Foster and Smith, page 9
and 95.
            Published by Harper SanFrancisco , 1990
(2) How to Listen to God , Charles Stanley, p.8
           Published by Thomas Nelson Publishers, Nashville, 1985
(3) The Problem of Pain, C.S. Lewis, p.81
           Published by London:Collins, 1940
(4) Windows of the Soul, Ken Gire, p.129
           Published by Zondervan, 1996
(5) Pursuing the Will of God, Jack Hayford, p.12
           Published by Multnomah Books, Sisters Oregon, 1997